I Take the Impact of Child Sexual Abuse Very Personally! 

  

Herbert Jay Rosenfield, ACSW, LCSW, BCD, CSSW

Herbert Jay Rosenfield, ACSW, LCSW, BCD, CSSW

Author, There Is Hope! ©; Founder, Rosenfield Innovation, LLC; Director, AFCCenter, LLC

No, I am not confessing to you that I have been a pedophile.  I have not!  And, no, I am not sharing that I am a #MeToo survivor.  I am a rare and lucky son-of-a-bitch who has reached the age of 72 and been spared the pain and baggage of serious family dysfunction, divorce, alcoholism, violence, and child sexual abuse.

The very personal impact for me is the reality and projection of those CSA statistics … that statistics estimate that at least 1 girl in 4 and 1 boy in 6 has experienced a sexually-abusive incident or pattern before the age of 18.  Those statistics mean that REAL people, who were and are important to me, had been sexually abused during childhood!  REAL people, about whom I care!  In addition to the 100s of CSA clients whom we have counseled, about whom I care and serve professionally with sincerity and commitment, the wake of CSA that I will never know the truth about is part of my life experience … and in yours.  Statistically, that means one of my beloved female 1st cousins and 2 of my male 1st cousins had been victimized!  Of my 40 YMCA Camp Massasoit dear campers with whose safety I was entrusted and that I diligently protected from 1962 to 1966, ~5 of the girls and ~3 of the boys who rode, laughed, and sang on my bus, had suffered child sexual abuse somewhere else by adulthood!  Of my New Bedford High School Class of ‘67, out of 560 classmates, conceivably as many as 70 of our gals and 50 of us guys were CSA victims before our graduation procession!  And from my 112 classmates at BU-SSW, Class of ’70, possibly 25 of the 100 women and 2 of us 12 men carried the burden of having been child sexual abuse victims into our professional education and social work careers!  REAL people, about whom I care!

Child sexual abuse in not ‘something that happens to those people, out there’.  Child sexual abuse is a travesty that occurred in our families, in our schools, in our communities, in our society, to REAL people!  We have been given an important platform and commitment by the courageous folks who have made this important subject visible in the headlines and on the screens – the men who participated on Oprah’s “100 Men” airing, the women who have come forward with their #MeToo sharing, and those adult women who have confronted powerful men who are sexual harassers and abusers from government, big business, the entertainment industry, the news mega-corporations, and amateur and professional athletics.  And I take the impact of child sexual abuse personally … we are seeing and hearing that this happens to REAL people, about whom we care … and I want us to work together to reduce the incidents of child sexual abuse in our society by 25% by 2025!

In the final chapter of my There Is Hope!,[2] from discussions with the researchers and the law enforcement professionals in the field, I offer the optimism that there is reason for hopefulness for future generations if we will dedicate our communities to …

(1)   Be honest in our society about who it is from whom we must protect our kids; 93% of perpetrators are individuals known to their CSA victims: family members; friends; neighbors; and folks in child-services roles such as babysitters, educators, medical personnel, and coaches;

(2)   Identify potential child sexual abusers before they ever abuse anybody;

(3)   Better prepare our children for life and adulthood, including age-appropriate sex-education;

(4)   Do a more competent pre-screening the folks whom we hire to have access to kids;

(5)   Maintain better records of the identity of convicted child sexual abuse perpetrators;

(6)   Greatly improve the communication and cooperation between State and Federal agencies;

(7)   Early Intervention: Catch the child sexual abuse occurrences sooner; and

(8)   Providing greater support for the victims to escape the unhealthy, abusive environments.

There Is Hope! for a safer and healthier future! But that accomplishment will require dedication and action by each of us, in our communities, in state and Federal legislatures and by law enforcement professionals, and in international forum policies and coordinated implementation, now and forever!

Herbert Jay Rosenfield, LCSW

[1] Rosenfield, Herbert Jay. There Is Hope! Practices and Interventions for the Successful Treatment of Adult Survivors of Child Sexual Abuse.© Book-in-progress. (2018).

If Sexually Victimized Adult Women Are Silent, How Can Child Victims Reveal?

WOW!  There is a striking list of the powerful, rich and famous men … Bill Clinton, Bill Cosby, Roger Ailes, Bill O’Reilly, Scott Hannity, Donald Trump, and Harvey Weinstein … who finally had been accused publicly of sexual harassment and victimization by a deluge of women!  As a man, a feminist, and a mental health professional, I am repulsed by and condemn their immoral, illegal, and unacceptable behaviors!

What are the reasons offered by their female accusers for their previous silence, sometimes remaining silent for many decades, about having been sexually harassed, assaulted, and raped?  More than 50 women have accused Bill Cosby of drugging and/or sexually assaulting them.  Some of Bill Cosby’s alleged victims explained their former silence: Victoria Valentino: “What kind of credibility did I have?”  Louisa Motiz: “You don’t want to upset me and the plans for your future, do you?”  Judy Huth: “… caused psychological damage and mental anguish”. Tama Green: “It is crushing and you are a victim all over again.”  Beth Ferrar: “… he allegedly said, We’ll never speak of this again.”  Beverly Johnson: “drugged … confused and disoriented”.  Barbara Bowman: “gaining her trust and becoming her mentor”. [1]

In 2017, women are breaking their silence about Harvey Weinstein.  Why were they secretive for so long?  Lucia Evans: “the shame in what happened”.  Asia Argento: “… has prompted years of guilt”.  Myra Sorvino: “felt afraid and intimidated”.  Emily Nestor: “I felt trapped”.  Emma de Caunis: “everyone’s too scared to say anything”.  Rosanna Arquette: “Weinstein’s power and reputation for vindictiveness”. [2]   Stars Ashley Judd, Gweneth Paltrow, and Angelina Jolie have now spoken up about Weinstein’s sexual attempts with them that paralleled the pattern of trap-and-mistreat that was described by the vulnerable women who were sexually abused by Harvey Weinstein.

The Chicago Tribune article of October 9th references the very consistent results in the March 2014 Iowa Law Review: “Disbelief assures that powerful men are reflexively believed when they scream foul at their accusers.  They may lambaste them as liars, cheats and gold-diggers, or ridicule and demean them as sluts.”[3]

So, I ask you — if bright, educated, usually attractive, verbally capable, and often successful women who have been sexually victimized have these feelings … and often have remained silent — how much more powerless must most children feel who are victims of child sexual abuse???  In a 2012 issue in Psychology Today, Dr. David Allen referenced Psychiatrist and author, Dr. Richard Kluft, MD, PhD, who listed several reasons for a child’s silence that vibrate similarly to those feelings and reasons for silence that are expressed by those adult victims: incomprehension, shame, fear of retaliation, the misperception that the child is to blame, and loyalty conflicts.[4]

Children and teenagers who are sexually abused, in 93% of cases, are betrayed by people whom they know, folks who have power over them.[5]  As I indicate in the “Introduction” to There Is Hope!, “while our society is warning children about ‘strangers’, we are still not accepting the well documented reality and providing them with adequate information about the dangers from molestation, rape, and incest by the ‘non-stranger’.  These have been the titles of some of the “trusted roles” …

  • “Father”               “Mother”        “Brother”        “Sister”                   “Grandfather”
  • “Step-Father”      “Uncle”            “Cousin”         “Mom’s Live-in Boy Friend”
  • “Foster brother” “Babysitter”   “Neighbor”     “Family Friend”   “Doctor”
  • “Teacher”            “Clergyman”   “Coach”           “Scout Leader”    “Counselor”
  • “Policeman”        “Fireman”       “Bus Drive”       …

… the titles of the “trusted roles” of the vast majority of perpetrators whose innocent victims we therapists have assisted in their healing in our counseling practices, agencies, and institutions. [6]

Now is the opportunity … the time is long overdue … for us to make positive changes in our societal pattern of sexualizing children and marginalizing women.  We need to end our culture of silence, initiate a more open dialogue, provide improved sex-education, and teach the next generations of us males that girls and women are equally valuable humans who deserve to be treated with respect and dignity.  “If not now, When?”

[1] http://www.etonline.com/news/154160_timeline_of_bill_cosby_sexual_assault_allegations

[2] https://www.newyorker.com/news/news-desk/from-aggressive-overtures-to-sexual-assault-harvey-weinsteins-accusers-tell-their-stories

[3] http://www.chicagotribune.com/news/opinion/commentary/ct-perspec-sex-assault-weinstein-cosby-1010-story.html   Drawn from the Internet 10/11/2017.

[4] www.psychologytoday.com/blog/matter-personality/201210/why-dont-child-sex-abuse-victims-tell  Drawn from Internet 10/11/2017.

[5] https://www.rainn.org/statistics/children-and-teens  Drawn from the Internet 10/11/2017.

[6] Rosenfield, Herbert Jay. There Is Hope! Practices and Interventions for Successful Treatment of Adult Survivors of Child Sexual Abuse ©. “Introduction”.  Book in progress 2017.

There Is Hope! for Adult Survivors of Child Sexual Abuse ©

Author:      Herbert Jay Rosenfield, LCSW, ACSW, BCD, CSSW

As a Licensed Clinical Social Worker and Certified School Social Worker, I have counseled and assisted a myriad of adolescent and adult survivors of child sexual abuse.  They have worked long and hard to face and accept the reality of the abuse that was foisted upon them, to wrestle with the strong emotions related to that betrayal, to become empowered, feel more confident, and to heal.

With There Is Hope! and within this website, I have refocused the book’s primary readership population to be those innocent victims, female and male survivors and caring folks in their support systems.  My goals are:

  • To validate the dangers and overwhelming experiences far too many non-strangers have sexually foisted upon children — their own and the kids of other families;
  • To share what we have learned from our clients, whose trust we have earned;
  • To describe some of the interventions – traditional approaches and innovations – we have found successful, offering tools with which your therapist can be more effective in supporting you to heal from the losses and damage done to you;
  • To share — with those real clients’ permission — some powerful, appropriately disguised case-examples of their painful experiences and hard-earned healing;
  • To encourage and assist clinicians to be caring and effective without being traumatized or suffering burnout;
  • To encourage and demonstrate that adult survivors of child sexual abuse can become healthy, caring, successful parents for their children; and
  • To offer real Hope! that we, societies’ members and organizations, must and can work together to drastically reduce future child sexual abuse.

To read the entire “Introduction” to There Is Hope! , please click on the MENU in the upper-right corner and then click on “About”.

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                                         My POSTS, listed here in newest-to-oldest order, are:

  • “I Take the Impact of Child Sex Very Personally!”  ©                01/23/2019                              
  • “Our Native Americans Didn’t Choose Reservations, Poverty, Alcoholism,                                                  and High Suicide Rates”                             01/23/2019
  • “Now is the Time for all Good Men to Come to the Aid of their Women” ©                                                                                                                                12/21/2017 
  • “If Sexually Victimized Adult Women Are Silent,                                                                                            How Can Child Victims Reveal?” ©                 10/14/2017
  • “Now is the Time!!!” ©                                                                        10/10/2017
  • “We Need to be Ahead of CSA Criminals!” ©                                07/19/2017
  • “Child Sexual Abuse Survivors Are Not Sleeping Well!”  ©     05/28/2017
  • “For a Bridge over Troubled  Waters, There Is Hope!”    ©      05/27/2014

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                   “I Take the Impact of Child Sexual Abuse Very Personally!”

No, I am not confessing to you that I have been a pedophile. I have not! And, no, I am not sharing that I am a #MeToo survivor. I am a rare and lucky son-of-a-bitch who has reached the age of 72 and been spared the pain and baggage of serious family dysfunction, divorce, alcoholism, violence, and child sexual abuse.

The very personal impact for me is the reality and projection of those CSA statistics … that statistics estimate that at least 1 girl in 4 and 1 boy in 6 has experienced a sexually-abusive incident or pattern before the age of 18. Those statistics mean that REAL people, who were and are important to me, had been sexually abused during childhood! REAL people, about whom I care! In addition to the 100s of CSA clients whom we have counseled, about whom I care and serve professionally with sincerity and commitment, the wake of CSA that I will never know the truth about is part of my life experience … and in yours. Statistically, that means one of my beloved female 1st cousins and 2 of my male 1st cousins had been victimized! Of my 40 YMCA Camp Massasoit dear campers with whose safety I was entrusted and that I diligently protected from 1962 to 1966, ~5 of the girls and ~3 of the boys who rode, laughed, and sang on my bus, had suffered child sexual abuse somewhere else by adulthood! Of my New Bedford High School Class of ‘67, out of 560 classmates, conceivably as many as 70 of our gals and 50 of us guys were CSA victims before our graduation procession! And from my 112 classmates at BU-SSW, Class of ’70, possibly 25 of the 100 women and 2 of us 12 men carried the burden of having been child sexual abuse victims into our professional education and social work careers! REAL people, about whom I care!

Child sexual abuse in not ‘something that happens to those people, out there’. Child sexual abuse is a travesty that occurred in our families, in our schools, in our communities, in our society, to REAL people! We have been given an important platform and commitment by the courageous folks who have made this important subject visible in the headlines and on the screens – the men who participated on Oprah’s “100 Men” airing, the women who have come forward with their #MeToo sharing, and those adult women who have confronted powerful men who are sexual harassers and abusers from government, big business, the entertainment industry, the news mega-corporations, and amateur and professional athletics. And I take the impact of child sexual abuse personally … we are seeing and hearing that this happens to REAL people, about whom we care … and I want us to work together to reduce the incidents of child sexual abuse in our society by 25% by 2025!

In the final chapter of my There Is Hope!,[2] from discussions with the researchers and the law enforcement professionals in the field, I offer the optimism that there is reason for hopefulness for future generations if we will dedicate our communities to …

(1)   Be honest in our society about who it is from whom we must protect our kids; 93% of perpetrators are individuals known to their CSA victims: family members; friends; neighbors; and folks in child-services roles such as babysitters, educators, medical personnel, and coaches;

(2)   Identify potential child sexual abusers before they ever abuse anybody;

(3)   Better prepare our children for life and adulthood, including age-appropriate sex-education;

(4)   Do a more competent pre-screening the folks whom we hire to have access to kids;

(5)   Maintain better records of the identity of convicted child sexual abuse perpetrators;

(6)   Greatly improve the communication and cooperation between State and Federal agencies;

(7)   Early Intervention: Catch the child sexual abuse occurrences sooner; and

(8)   Providing greater support for the victims to escape the unhealthy, abusive environments.

There Is Hope! for a safer and healthier future! But that accomplishment will require dedication and action by each of us, in our communities, in state and Federal legislatures and by law enforcement professionals, and in international forum policies and coordinated implementation, now and forever!

Herbert Jay Rosenfield, LCSW

[1] Rosenfield, Herbert Jay. There Is Hope! Practices and Interventions for the Successful Treatment of Adult Survivors of Child Sexual Abuse.© Book-in-progress. (2018).

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“Our Native Americans Didn’t Choose Reservations, Poverty,

Alcoholism, and High Suicide Rates”

The Chairman of the Senate Committee on Indian Affairs, Senator Byron L. Dorgan, of North Dakota, stated in 2010: “Of the 10 poorest counties in America … eight of them are on Indian reservations.  All eight have very high Indian populations. … Unemployment means poverty, in most cases, despair, high suicide rates, dropout rates, poor health, poor housing conditions.  It all relates to chronic and very high unemployment.” [1]

The plight of most of our Native Americans in 2018 continues to be sad, unfortunate and unnecessary.  There are interventions we can perform that will have a positive impact upon the unemployment, the poverty, the alcoholism, and the suicide rate for Native American tribes living on their Reservations on which they didn’t choose to live.

As a clinical social worker and a 2014 Caravan Tour visitor to parts of five beautiful states to which we had never traveled before — South Dakota, Montana, Wyoming, Idaho, and Utah — I was struck by the history and dismayed by the current status of our Native Americans.  It is time now for creating an accomplishable, significant improvement.  Not by additional welfare … but the introduction of skills, training, education, tools, and employment that will raise their opportunity, optimism, and quality of life.

Most of the items for sale in the Park Stores were made in China and in the Philippines, including each of the offered membership gifts.  On 07/15/2014, I wrote to Jeff Brown, Chairman of Yellowstone Park Association, and asked him about this.  “Why can’t Yellowstone Park Association perform two good deeds at once?
(1) Providing the ‘inspire, educate, and preserve’ services you are already engaged in, and (2) Funding it by selling items that will now be manufactured by traditional hand-crafts and light industry established for Native Americans on the reservations.  The labels will now read:  Made in America … by Native Americans” , made with their traditional creativity and new skills, with their new tools, and on their new machinery.

Receiving no satisfactory response, I subsequently asked this question to numerous national leaders who are in a position of responsibility and have the power to present this idea on the national scene –

  • 07/21/2014: Senate Committee on Indian Affairs: Senator Jon Tester, Montana Senator, Chairman; Senator John Barrasso, Wyoming Senator, Vice Chairman;
  • 02/06/2015: Secretary of the Interior Sally Jewell; Jon Jarvis, Director, National Park Service
  • 12/06/2017: 5 Native Americans in Congress: Representative Ami Bera (D-Calif.); Senator Kamala Harris (D-Calif.); Representative Ro Khanna (D-Calif.); Representative Pramila Jayapal (D-Wash.); and Representative Raja Krishnamoorthi (D-Ill.)

… and not one of them even addressed my letters and emails with a perfunctory template response!  Is this idea highly unreasonable and impossible to implement, a topic that is too hot to handle, or does nobody really care about the plight of our Native American brothers and sisters in the 21st century?

What does this situation have to do with There Is Hope! and the issue of ‘child sexual abuse’?  It is another example of the ‘powerful’ ignoring the needs of or taking advantage of the vulnerable.

                   [1] Hon. Byron L. Dorgan, U.S. Senator From North Dakota, Hearing Before the Committee                       On Indian Affairs, United States Senate, January 28, 2010:  Chairman’s Opening Statement.

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    “Now is the Time for all Good Men to Come to the Aid of their Women”

“Now is the time for all good men to come to the aid of their party!” was a sentence devised to test the speed of the first typewriter, in Milwaukee, Wisconsin, in the fall of 1867.  Now, 150 years later, I strongly encourage, “Now is the time for all good men to come to the aid of their women!”  It is loooooong overdue!  For all of us men who — privately and quietly — have treated women and appropriately, it is time for us to do so publicly, loudly, and frequently!

It is terrific that women – individually and collectively — are finally feeling more empowered.  Many women are taking to the airwaves, the internet, the stage, and to print media and boldly declaring “NO MORE!”  As a result, numerous disrespectful and inappropriate powerful public men are having their come-uppance.[1]  And many more surely will follow in political, corporate, entertainment, newscasting, and community settings.

However, it will be more appropriate, respectful, and impactful if women do not have to stand alone in decrying the discrimination, intimidation, embarrassment, humiliation, victimization, and perpetration that has been far too much of an unhealthy part of gender-relationships in most of our societies around the globe!  This is not a ‘women’s issue’.  This is an important ‘human issue’ and a ‘societal problem’ that must be addressed and reformed.  Certainly, there is a proportion of child sexual abuse and of sexual molestation, abuse, and rape that is performed by females.  Victims of Crime.Org reports, “It is estimated that women are the abusers in about 14% of cases reported among boys and 6% of cases reported among girls.” [2]  Nonetheless, that fact does not minimize or dismiss the HUGE, disproportionate statistics and reality of dysfunctional, immoral, and illegal behaviors by far too many of us males.

Here are some suggestions of what we men can begin to do, individually and collectively:

(a) Self-Assessment:  Take stock of yourself with an objective look at your own thought process regarding women and your verbalizations and behaviors.  Make positive changes where needed.  Perhaps you need to catch yourself telling your favorite ‘blonde joke’ and delete it from your repertoire.  Stop referring to your 53-year-old woman receptionist as ‘my girl at the front desk’.

(b) Family-Feedback:  Ask your family members whether there are any modifications they would like to see in your words and actions that would make them more comfortable and happier.  Perhaps your wife and daughter are sick and tired of your rolling your eyes when they speak about their frustrations with us men.  Maybe they are offended by your humor that included comments and jokes which demean them and other women.  Respond to their feedback with sincere and loving kindness and take positive action to make your short-term changes into permanent new habits.

(c) Friendships: Within your friendship group, generate discussions regarding the women’s and societal issues of concern.  By encouraging those folks who value their relationship with you and who trust and value your opinions, you can be a role-model and have a positive impact on the thoughts, speech, behaviors, and social action of those with whom you socialize.

(d) Community:  As a member of your home-community, get involved with like-minded neighbors, members of your religious affiliation, social-service organizations to which you belong, and your fellow citizens to lobby for gender-fairness in the hiring and promotion practices in your school system and town or city’s administration.  Work with your school system’s leadership toward the inclusion of programs and presentations which teach our children values and skills that reduce bullying, violence, and sexism in the lives of the next generations of our voting public.

(e) Work-Place:  Analyze your work-setting to feel and to see whether there are discriminatory and/or sexist environments or policies.  Utilizing the current activism atmosphere in the USA, have the courage to speak up and make suggestions in a manner that will garner the support of others and successes.  Speak up in situations in which you hear or see unhealthy, sexist polices and behaviors.

(f)  Societal:  Support qualified female candidates who are running for office.  Attend political meetings sponsored by your state and national representatives and speak up for gender-equality and sexual- abuse prevention issues.  Put your money where your mouth is and contribute to the campaigns of candidates who have demonstrated philosophies and legislation that creates a more positive societal environment for our women … and as a result for all of us men, too.  Believe the reality that nearly every woman who would take the uncomfortable and embarrassing risk of coming forth and accusing someone with power for having sexually harassed, molested, assaulted and/or raped her.  Work toward making those men in power, including the President, are held accountable for their immoral and illegal misbehaviors.

As a social worker for nearly 50 years who has focused on the treatment of adult

survivors of child sexual abuse, the issues related to the healthier childrearing and treatment of children and of women and men are especially important to my clients and to me.  Let’s work together toward a healthier, safer, happier, more egalitarian society.

Yes, now is the time for all good men to come to aid of their women! 

[1] http://www.businessinsider.com/powerful-men-accused-of-sexual-misconduct-after-harvey-weinstein-list-2017-10?op=0#%5D
[2] http://victimsofcrime.org/media/reporting-on-child-sexual-abuse/statistics-on-perpetrators-of-csa

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                              If Sexually Victimized Adult Women Are Silent,                                                                        How Can Child Victims Reveal?

WOW!  There is a striking list of the powerful, rich and famous men … Bill Clinton, Bill Cosby, Roger Ailes, Bill O’Reilly, Scott Hannity, Donald Trump, and Harvey Weinstein … who finally had been accused publicly of sexual harassment and victimization by a deluge of women!  As a man, a feminist, and a mental health professional, I am repulsed by and condemn their immoral, illegal, and unacceptable behaviors!

What are the reasons offered by their female accusers for their previous silence, sometimes remaining silent for many decades, about having been sexually harassed, assaulted, and raped?  More than 50 women have accused Bill Cosby of drugging and/or sexually assaulting them.  Some of Bill Cosby’s alleged victims explained their former silence: Victoria Valentino: “What kind of credibility did I have?”  Louisa Motiz: “You don’t want to upset me and the plans for your future, do you?”  Judy Huth: “… caused psychological damage and mental anguish”. Tama Green: “It is crushing and you are a victim all over again.”  Beth Ferrar: “… he allegedly said, We’ll never speak of this again.”  Beverly Johnson: “drugged … confused and disoriented”.  Barbara Bowman: “gaining her trust and becoming her mentor”. [1]

In 2017, women are breaking their silence about Harvey Weinstein.  Why were they secretive for so long?  Lucia Evans: “the shame in what happened”.  Asia Argento: “… has prompted years of guilt”.  Myra Sorvino: “felt afraid and intimidated”.  Emily Nestor: “I felt trapped”.  Emma de Caunis: “everyone’s too scared to say anything”.  Rosanna Arquette: “Weinstein’s power and reputation for vindictiveness”. [2]   Stars Ashley Judd, Gweneth Paltrow, and Angelina Jolie have now spoken up about Weinstein’s sexual attempts with them that paralleled the pattern of trap-and-mistreat that was described by the vulnerable women who were sexually abused by Harvey Weinstein.

The Chicago Tribune article of October 9th references the very consistent results in the March 2014 Iowa Law Review: “Disbelief assures that powerful men are reflexively believed when they scream foul at their accusers.  They may lambaste them as liars, cheats and gold-diggers, or ridicule and demean them as sluts.”[3]

So, I ask you — if bright, educated, usually attractive, verbally capable, and often successful women who have been sexually victimized have these feelings … and often have remained silent — how much more powerless must most children feel who are victims of child sexual abuse???  In a 2012 issue in Psychology Today, Dr. David Allen referenced Psychiatrist and author, Dr. Richard Kluft, MD, PhD, who listed several reasons for a child’s silence that vibrate similarly to those feelings and reasons for silence that are expressed by those adult victims: incomprehension, shame, fear of retaliation, the misperception that the child is to blame, and loyalty conflicts.[4]

Children and teenagers who are sexually abused, in 93% of cases, are betrayed by people whom they know, folks who have power over them.[5]  As I indicate in the “Introduction” to There Is Hope!, “while our society is warning children about ‘strangers’, we are still not accepting the well documented reality and providing them with adequate information about the dangers from molestation, rape, and incest by the ‘non-stranger’.  These have been the titles of some of the “trusted roles” …

“Father”          “Mother”        “Brother”        “Sister”               “Grandfather”       “Step-Father”     “Uncle”      “Cousin”        “Mom’s Live-in Boy Friend”   “Foster brother”     “Babysitter”       “Neighbor”      “Family Friend”   “Doctor” “Teacher”          “Clergyman”         “Coach”             “Scout Leader”    “Counselor”  “Policeman”    “Fireman”        “Bus Driver”          …

… the titles of the “trusted roles” of the vast majority of perpetrators whose innocent victims we therapists have assisted in their healing in our counseling practices, agencies, and institutions. [6]

Now is the opportunity … the time is long overdue … for us to make positive changes in our societal pattern of sexualizing children and marginalizing women.  We need to end our culture of silence, initiate a more open dialogue, provide improved sex-education, and teach the next generations of us males that girls and women are equally valuable humans who deserve to be treated with respect and dignity.  “If not now, When?”

[1] http://www.etonline.com/news/154160_timeline_of_bill_cosby_sexual_assault_allegations
[2] https://www.newyorker.com/news/news-desk/from-aggressive-overtures-to-sexual-assault-harvey-weinsteins-accusers-tell-their-stories
[3] http://www.chicagotribune.com/news/opinion/commentary/ct-perspec-sex-assault-weinstein-cosby-1010-story.html   Drawn from the Internet 10/11/2017.
[4] www.psychologytoday.com/blog/matter-personality/201210/why-dont-child-sex-abuse-victims-tell  Drawn from Internet 10/11/2017.
[5] https://www.rainn.org/statistics/children-and-teens  Drawn from the Internet 10/11/2017.
[6] Rosenfield, Herbert Jay. There Is Hope! Practices and Interventions for Successful Treatment of Adult Survivors of Child Sexual Abuse ©. “Introduction”.  Book in progress 2017.

                                                       ***************************  

                                                            “Now is the time!!!”                                                   

Now is the time!!!  2018 is the year!!!  #MeToo is a catalyst!!!  Now, we all need to keep our focus on the important issues that have been raised by individual survivors, by courageous whistle-blowers who have spoken up against powerful bosses, political icons, leaders in the entertainment industry, and by national and international experts.

And the HUGE concerns and alarm raised by the many of us who have been frightened by Donald John Trump since the Republican primaries in 2016.  I sent this email to several opposing Presidential candidates and to three other trusted members of Congress, resulting in “0” responses from any of them.  Perhaps it was too hot back then:

March 5th, 2016

I strongly believe that Donald Trump’s personality and behaviors fit closely to this medical diagnosis of “Narcissistic Personality Disorder”!  Perhaps that is why he admires and thinks that his is similar and can negotiate with Vladimir Putin.   It is not the case for each ‘He’s just a showman’ or ‘He has a large ego’ or ‘He’s like all politicians” or “He likes power and has a positive opinion of himself’.  Each of these men is dangerous!!!!  Is there some vehicle or avenue with which to get this diagnosis into the media/political dialogue?

Herbert Jay Rosenfield, LCSW

You can access related articles posted on my LinkedIn.Com profile:

  • “If It Looks Like a Duck …”​                                                                           01/29/2017
  • “Now is the Time!”                                                                                        03/14/2017
  •  “BEWARE OF CULT-LIKE LEADERSHIP!”                                            09/27/2017
  • “Now is the Time for all Good Men to Come to the Aid of their Women”  12/20/2017

Now is the time!!!

                                                   ***************************  

“We need to be ahead of CSA criminals”

During his July Senate hearing on his nomination for the FBI Director, Christopher Wray spoke about intervening into the dangers of ISIS seeking American youth recruits.  He warned, “Plots don’t happen overnight.  They take time to germinate.  We need to be in a position where we find them early and stop them early.” … “We need to be ahead of the criminals.”

This assessment and goal is precisely accurate regarding perpetrators who are trolling to find victims for their child sexual abuse.  Learning from FBI Director-to-be Wray, I suggest, “Opportunities to perpetrate child sexual abuse don’t happen overnight.  They take time to germinate.  We need to be in a position where we find them early and stop them early. … We need to be ahead of these child sexual abuse perpetrating criminals.”  

Here is an example of one of our past failure in that prevention process.  Having listened to the manipulation and sex abuse that had been foisted upon my numerous innocent and vulnerable adult CSA survivors, I have created this ‘confidential admission’ from one of those pedophiles that may make you uncomfortable to read, as he ‘shares’ his planful techniques and implementation.

“My name Aristotle and I am a 35-year-old science teacher in your local middle school.  I love teaching science to our 6th grade kids because they are so fascinating, motivating, and able to be engaged.  When they are assigned a teacher who is knowledgeable and invested in their subject, utilizes creative and multi-media ways to present material, and remains approachable for discussions and extra help, kids learn better and they succeed.  That is how I teach and that is the secret to my superior accomplishments for over 12 years as a teacher.  Also, I am the school’s Coordinator for the fall 7th grade science fair projects and I coach the girls’ 8th grade varsity soccer team.”

“There is another reason why I spend most of my time at the school.  This is the one reason you can’t tell anybody, because I will vehemently deny it!  Ever since I was a 16 and a junior in high school, I have been very sexually attracted to 11 and 12-year-old girls.  They are so spontaneous, innocent, full of energy, attractive, unspoiled, and they need an older guy to show them interest and to give them what they want and need!  I can really connect with them and engage them in a meaningful relationship, especially with those who do not have a stable home environment and they need a positive male adult role model.”

“Now, as a teacher, coordinator, and coach, I get to spend loads of time with these girls, in the classroom, advising 7th graders in their work on their science fair projects, and coaching the 8th graders on the soccer field and in the locker-room.  I must be careful with my behaviors and my words, so nobody else catches onto to my patterns and behaviors, because they wouldn’t understand and I would lose my job and go to jail.  But I have gotten very proficient in choosing which 6th grader I connect with each year and then in keeping them apart from each other during their 3 years in our school.  During the first month of the school year, I carefully select a somewhat shy, sad-looking, and socially isolated blond girl who has a pretty face, and a slowly developing adolescent body.  So very sweet, inexperienced, and fresh!  That really turns me on and those characteristics result in an opportunity to spend some after-school time alone with her without her having friends who are hanging around and meddling in our developing relationship.  The first time that Helena has difficulty with a science assignment or she seems to have been left behind by the other kids at the end of the class period, I take the opportunity to empathize with her and suggest that she come back after school to talk about how she is feeling.  I go slowly, feeling out the situation, careful to avoid getting ahead of the flow and blowing the opportunity.”

“If she does return to my room after school, I make sure that there are no other kids around when I tutor her about that science concept that gave her trouble or when I provide her with support about her peer social isolation.  I control myself, stay focused on the task of courting her trust, and keep my hands to myself.  I may make a mild complimentary comment about her smile or the color of her hair, but I am careful to say nothing ‘over the top’ and continue to move ahead slowly, reminding myself to be patient.  The very process of building our relationship is exciting and energizing for me.  A smile during class time.  A ‘nice job’ comment on an assignment.  Each action is calculated to build our connection and trust.”

“In a second after-school opportunity to build our relationship, I might ask her if she is hungry and may offer her a box of raisons from my desk drawer.  I may ask a non-threatening question about her family make-up, slowly getting to know her better.  In a third such meeting, I will show Helena that I remember what she has told me previously and provide her some verbal solace and support about something sad she shares with me.  I take the opportunity to draw a parallel between us, such as our shared Greek heritage.  As she is leaving my room when the after-school bell rings, I may gently put my hand on her shoulder, look her in the eyes, and said, ‘I am glad that you are in my class and you trust me.  Thank you.’”                                                    .          “I must control myself and my own hormones!  After she leaves my room, I usually lock my classroom door, go into the attached bathroom, and jerk off, thinking about her sweet smile, her flowing blond hair, and her long legs that I watched under her desk during her class time.”

“As the weeks advance, I share with Helena a story, such as my understanding how difficult it is to move into a new community while in middle school.  I fabricate, in a sad voice, ‘The kids were cliquey and they were cruel to me as the new kid in the class.’  Helena says that she is sorry that I went through that pain, because it is what she is experiencing right now.  I reach over, gently place my hand onto hers on the lab-counter, and say, ‘I am sorry to hear that you are experiencing the same sadness and rejection that I went through!’

“My heart is racing and I have a boner that I was hiding from Helena with my clip-board.  After she leaves, it is time for locking the door and heading to the bathroom again!”

“The next time that I am alone in my classroom with Helena, I tell her, ‘You are very special to me.  I haven’t told anybody else, but my dog, Zeus, died during the summer after 12 years and I was devastated.  You are making a difficult start to the school year much better for me.  You are like my Greek goddess.  Thank you.’  Helena smiles and says, ‘I am sorry that your dog, Zeus, died … and I am glad that I was assigned to your class.  You are special to me, also.’  I lean over and plant a gentle kiss on her forehead.  She smiles, shyly, and blushes.”

“We slowly get more physical during after-school sessions, with a hug and a real kiss.  That leads to our making plans for her to come to my apartment this weekend.  I tell neighbors she is my niece.  I tell her, ‘Nobody would really understand our relationship and they would just be jealous and try to separate us.’  Helena says, ‘I understand … and this is our private secret.’”

“Game on!”

Sexual Perpetrators Manipulate

Minds & Touch Body Parts. ☹

We can and we must do better!  In my Chapter 9 of There Is Hope!, I propose these dozen preventative and interventive steps that I have garnered from experience and consultation with experts in the field, working together “For A Better and Safer Tomorrow!”:

  1. Better prepare our children for life and for adulthood.
  2. Be honest in our society about who primarily it is from whom we must protect our kids! 3. Utilize in your practice-setting the “Finding You’re A.C.E. Score” to identify folks who have been victimized in childhood and intervene into the myriad of negative health related consequences of having a score of four or higher!
  3. Increase our scientific, medically-based knowledge of pedophilia and pedophiles.
  4. Identify potential child sexual abusers before they ever abuse anybody!
  5. Provide those who self-identify as ‘potential’ offenders with effective treatment.
  6. Do a more competent screening of folks whom we allow to have access to our kids.
  7. Early Intervention: Catch the child sexual abuse occurrences sooner.
  8. Police Departments benefit their communities with the specialized “Sex Crimes Unit”.                                     10.  Prisoners Need Counseling Services.
  9. Maintain better records of the identity of convicted child sexual abuse perpetrators

and improve inter-state, national, and international access and sharing of those records.

  1. Require more effective monitoring, closer supervision, and tracking of CSA parolees.

We must be realists and recognize that we will never succeed in eradicating all child sexual abuse … but we can considerably reduce the percentage of our precious kids in the next generation who will be victimized.  When we have created an environment in our communities where these recommendations have been implemented, we will have accomplished a tremendous advantage for the future generations of our children, saving millions of kids and adults the pain and burden that had befallen so many victims in the past.

                                                                                                                                © Herbert Jay Rosenfield 2017

                                               ***************************  

                            “Child Sexual Abuse Survivors Are Not Sleeping Well!”

During the Presidential campaign, many women and men who are adult survivors of child sexual abuse were particularly distressed by the contrast between the public declarations of respectfulness of women by then-candidate Donald Trump and the observations and accusations to the contrary.

  •  “Fifteen women have come forward with allegations against Donald Trump, each accusing him of inappropriate conduct. Their charges range from an unwanted touch from behind to aggressive, sudden kissing to fingers groping up their skirt and into their underwear.”   [3]                [ http://www.pbs.org/newshour/rundown/assault-allegations-donald-trump-recapped/  ]
  • “The events never happened. Never. All of these liars will be sued after the election is over,” Trump said during a speech Saturday in Gettysburg, Pa.    [4]                              [  http://www.npr.org/2016/10/13/497799354/a-list-of-donald-trumps-accusers-of-inappropriate-sexual-conduct ]

  • Of adult women and men who had been sexually abused as children, over 90% were abused by a perpetrator who was significantly older, known to the victim, and held a position of authority and/or power over the vulnerable child.  Most of those ‘trusted adults’ had a positive public image … and the secret behavior of being a pedophile.  As I have written in my book-in-progress, There Is Hope! Practices and Interventions for Successful Treatment of Adult Survivors of Child Sexual Abuse ©:

“These have been the titles of some of the “trusted roles” …

“Father”          “Mother”        “Brother”        “Sister”             “Grandfather”       “Step-Father”     “Uncle”       “Cousin”       “Mom’s Live-in Boy Friend”   “Foster brother”     “Babysitter”       “Neighbor”       “Family Friend” “Doctor” “Teacher”          “Clergyman”         “Coach”             “Scout Leader”  “Counselor”  “Policeman”    “Fireman”         “Bus Driver”          …

… the titles of the “trusted roles” of the vast majority of perpetrators whose innocent victims we therapists have assisted in their healing in our counseling practices, agencies, and institutions.” [5]

With the reality of what they had experienced in their childhood and the media political coverage of the campaign, election, and ‘The First 100 Days’, this potentially reminds each survivor daily of what happened to her or him by another ‘trusted male’.  Most child sexual abuse survivors are not sleeping very well!

As advocates and mental health providers, we must be aware of this private-public connection and, particularly, of its impact on this Child Sexual Abuse Survivor population.  They need us to be sensitive to their possibly feeling even more vulnerable, having sleep difficulties, and having increased flashbacks and nightmares. They need us to reach out to them and offer our appropriate support now.

[1]  http://www.nbcnews.com/meet-the-press/video/trump-no-one-respects-women-more-than-i-do-655453251628 
[2]  https://www.nytimes.com/2016/10/08/us/donald-trump-tape-transcript.html   
[3]  http://www.pbs.org/newshour/rundown/assault-allegations-donald-trump-recapped/  
[4]  http://www.npr.org/2016/10/13/497799354/a-list-of-donald-trumps-accusers-of-inappropriate-sexual-conduct 
[5] Rosenfield, Herbert Jay. “Introduction”. There Is Hope! Practices and Interventions for Successful Treatment of Adult Survivors of Child Sexual Abuse ©.  2017. Book in progress.

                                    ***************************  

Now is the Time!!!

Now is the time!!!  Now is the time for organizations which serve children and teenagers to choose to protect their charges instead of deflecting charges of child sexual abuse to protect the organization’s reputation!

Boy Scouts of America![1]  The Catholic Church![2]  University of Pennsylvania Football![3] Elite private boarding schools![4]  Jewish Orthodox Schools in Australia and Connecticut [5],[6]    Los Angeles Public School System![7]  USA Gymnastics![8]

The leadership of these varied and well-known organizations have — repeatedly and for an extended period of time — failed in their responsibilities to the children and teenagers they were tasked with protecting and serving.  Out of naivety, carelessness, ignorance, selfishness, or hubris, the Boards of Directors, the professionals, and the volunteers have both missed the symptoms and often refused to confront, to terminate, and to report to authorities the perpetrators in their employ.

Now is the time!!!  The professional and lay leadership of youth-serving organizations must step forward and create what should already have been in place … the appropriately safe, loving, nurturing environments for their youth members or participants.  In my summers and full-time professional employment, I have worked for agencies of the YMCA, Boys’ Club, Jewish Community Centers, and Public Schools.  Yes, I understand that there are many tasks and responsibilities involved in a maintaining a functioning public or non-profit organization, including: ‘staff hiring and supervision’; ‘program planning and implementation’; ‘marketing’; ‘fundraising’; ‘public relations’; ‘record-keeping’; ‘facility maintenance’; ‘accounting’; and ‘complying with local, state, and national laws, filings, and record-keeping’.  Nonetheless, our primary purpose needs to remain our creating and maintaining a hospitable and safe environment for the youth whom we serve, regardless of the nature or location of our programs and services.

The Center for Disease Control and Prevention issued an excellent document [9] that I would recommend as a foundation for all of us — Preventing Child Sexual Abuse Within Youth-serving Organizations: Getting Started on Policies and Procedures.  The Table of Contents includes information that can serve as a starting point for any agency, school, or facility: Screening and selecting employees and volunteers; Guidelines on interactions between individuals; Monitoring behavior; Ensuring safe environments; Responding to inappropriate behavior, breaches in policy, and allegations and suspicions of child sexual abuse; and Training about child sexual abuse prevention – for employees/volunteers; caregivers; and youth.

As a seasoned clinical social worker who has focused for several decades on the treatment of adult survivors of child sexual abuse and writing There Is Hope!, I implore the leaders of our youth-serving organization around the world to wake up to our responsibility! Now is the time!!!  If not now, when???

[1] https://nonprofitquarterly.org/2012/08/09/the-boy-scouts-scandal-institutional-irresponsibility-and-institutional-homophobia/

[2] https://www.bostonglobe.com/metro/2017/01/05/church-sex-abuse-victims-still-coming-forward/Qe4kWBAdkR4NWqDepiNEXM/story.html ry.html

[3] http://www.cbsnews.com/feature/the-penn-state-scandal/

[4] https://www.bostonglobe.com/metro/2016/05/06/private-schools-painful-secrets/OaRI9PFpRnCTJxCzko5hkN/sto[4]

[5] http://www.timesofisrael.com/yeshiva-day-school-child-abuse-cases-rock-australia/

[6] http://www.nhregister.com/20160503/rabbi-principal-of-yeshiva-of-new-haven-accused-of-sexually-abusing-boy

[7] http://www.thedailybeast.com/articles/2013/01/25/los-angeles-s-school-nightmare-another-sex-abuse-scandal.html

[8] https://www.nytimes.com/2017/02/22/sports/olympics/usa-gymnastics-doctor-larry-nassar-sexual-assault-charges.html?_r=0

[9] Saul J, Audage NC. Preventing Child Sexual Abuse Within Youth-serving Organizations:Getting Started on Policies and Procedures. Atlanta (GA): Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, National Center for Injury Prevention and Control; 2007.

“We need to be ahead of CSA criminals”

During his July Senate hearing on his nomination for the FBI Director, Christopher Wray spoke about intervening into the dangers of ISIS seeking American youth recruits.  He warned, “Plots don’t happen overnight.  They take time to germinate.  We need to be in a position where we find them early and stop them early.” … “We need to be ahead of the criminals.”

This assessment and goal is precisely accurate regarding perpetrators who are trolling to find victims for their child sexual abuse.  Learning from FBI Director-to-be Wray, I suggest, “Opportunities to perpetrate child sexual abuse don’t happen overnight.  They take time to germinate.  We need to be in a position where we find them early and stop them early. … We need to be ahead of these child sexual abuse perpetrating criminals.”   Here is an example of one of our past failure in that prevention process.  Having listened to the manipulation and sex abuse that had been foisted upon my numerous innocent and vulnerable adult CSA survivors, I have created this ‘confidential admission’ from one of those pedophiles that may make you uncomfortable, as he ‘shares’ his planful techniques and implementation.

                                             A Teacher 

                                             Opens  Minds &

                                             Touch Hearts! 

“My name Aristotle and I am a 35-year-old science teacher in your local middle school.  I love teaching science to our 6th grade kids because they are so fascinating, motivating, and able to be engaged.  When they are assigned a teacher who is knowledgeable and invested in their subject, utilizes creative and multi-media ways to present material, and remains approachable for discussions and extra help, kids learn better and they succeed.  That is how I teach and that is the secret to my superior accomplishments for over 12 years as a teacher.  Also, I am the school’s Coordinator for the fall 7th grade science fair projects and I coach the girls’ varsity soccer team.”

“There is another reason why I spend most of my time at the school.  This is the one reason you can’t tell anybody, because I will vehemently deny it!  Ever since I was a 16 and a junior in high school, I have been very sexually attracted to 11 and 12-year-old girls.  They are so spontaneous, innocent, full of energy, attractive, unspoiled, and they need an older guy to show them interest and to give them what they want and need!  I can really connect with them and engage them in a meaningful relationship, especially with those who do not have a stable home environment and they need a positive male adult role model.”

“Now, as a teacher, coordinator, and coach, I get to spend loads of time with these girls, in the classroom, advising 7th graders in their work on their science fair projects, and coaching the 8th graders on the soccer field and in the locker-room.  I must be careful with my behaviors and my words, so nobody else catches onto to my patterns and behaviors, because they wouldn’t understand and I would lose my job and go to jail.  But I have gotten very proficient in choosing which 6th grader I connect with each year and then in keeping them apart from each other during their 3 years in our school.  During the first month of the school year, I carefully select a somewhat shy, sad-looking, and socially isolated blond girl who has a pretty face, and a slowly developing adolescent body.  So very sweet, inexperienced, and fresh!  That really turns me on and those characteristics result in an opportunity to spend some after-school time alone with her without her having friends who are hanging around and meddling in our developing relationship.  The first time that Helena has difficulty with a science assignment or she seems to have been left behind by the other kids at the end of the class period, I take the opportunity to empathize with her and suggest that she come back after school to talk about how she is feeling.  I go slowly, feeling out the situation, careful to avoid getting ahead of the flow and blowing the opportunity.”

“If she does return to my room after school, I make sure that there are no other kids around when I tutor her about that science concept that gave her trouble or when I provide her with support about her peer social isolation.  I control myself, stay focused on the task of courting her trust, and keep my hands to myself.  I may make a mild complimentary comment about her smile or the color of her hair, but I am careful to say nothing ‘over the top’ and continue to move ahead slowly, reminding myself to be patient.  The very process of building our relationship is exciting and energizing for me.  A smile during class time.  A ‘nice job’ comment on an assignment.  Each action is calculated to build our connection and trust.”

“In a second after-school opportunity to build our relationship, I might ask her if she is hungry and may offer her a box of raisins from my desk drawer.  I may ask a non-threatening question about her family make-up, slowly getting to know her better.  In a third such meeting, I will show Helena that I remember what she has told me previously and provide her some verbal solace and support about something sad she shares with me.  I take the opportunity to draw a parallel between us, such as our shared Greek heritage.  As she is leaving my room when the after-school bell rings, I may gently put my hand on her shoulder, look her in the eyes, and said, ‘I am glad that you are in my class and you trust me.  Thank you.’”                                                    .

“I must control myself and my own hormones!  After she leaves my room, I usually lock my classroom door, go into the attached bathroom, and jerk off, thinking about her sweet smile, her flowing blond hair, and her long legs that I watched under her desk during her class time.”

“As the weeks advance, I share with Helena a story, such as my understanding how difficult it is to move into a new community while in middle school.  I fabricate, in a sad voice, ‘The kids were cliquey and they were cruel to me as the new kid in the class.’  Helena says that she is sorry that I went through that pain, because it is what she is experiencing right now.  I reach over, gently place my hand onto hers on the lab-counter, and say, ‘I am sorry to hear that you are experiencing the same sadness and rejection that I went through!’

“My heart is racing and I have a boner that I was hiding from Helena with my clip-board.  After she leaves, it is time for locking the door and heading to the bathroom again!”

“The next time that I am alone in my classroom with Helena, I tell her, ‘You are very special to me.  I haven’t told anybody else, but my dog, Zeus, died during the summer after 12 years and I was devastated.  You are making a difficult start to the school year much better for me.  You are like my Greek goddess.  Thank you.’  Helena smiles and says, ‘I am sorry that your dog, Zeus, died … and I am glad that I was assigned to your class.  You are special to me, also.’  I lean over and plant a gentle kiss on her forehead.  She smiles, shyly, and blushes.”

“We slowly get more physical during after-school sessions, with a hug and a real kiss.  That leads to our making plans for her to come to my apartment this weekend.  I tell neighbors she is my niece.  I tell her, ‘Nobody would really understand our relationship and they would just be jealous and try to separate us.’  Helena says, ‘I understand … and this is our private secret.’”

“Game on!”

                                            A Sexual Perpetrator

                                            Manipulates Minds &

                                            Touches Body Parts. 

We can and we must do better!  In my Chapter 9 of There Is Hope!, I propose these dozen preventative and intervention steps that I have garnered from experience and consultation with experts in the field, working together “For A Better and Safer Tomorrow!”:

  1. Better prepare our children for life and for adulthood.
  2. Be honest in our society about who primarily it is from whom we must protect our kids!
  3. Utilize in your practice-setting the “Finding You’re A.C.E. Score” to identify folks who have been victimized in childhood and intervene into the myriad of negative health related consequences of having a score of four or higher!
  4. Increase our scientific, medically-based knowledge of pedophilia and pedophiles.
  5. Identify potential child sexual abusers before they ever abuse anybody!
  6. Provide those who self-identify as ‘potential’ offenders with effective treatment.
  7. Do a more competent screening of folks whom we allow to have access to our kids.
  8. Early Intervention: Catch the child sexual abuse occurrences sooner.
  9. Police Departments benefit their communities with the specialized “Sex Crimes Unit”.
  10.   Prisoners Need Counseling Services.
  11. Maintain better records of the identity of convicted child sexual abuse perpetrators and improve inter-state, national, and international access and sharing of those records.
  12. Require more effective monitoring, closer supervision, and tracking of CSA parolees.

We must be realists and recognize that we will never succeed in eradicating all child sexual abuse … but we can considerably reduce the percentage of our precious kids in the next generation who will be victimized.  When we have created an environment in our communities where these recommendations have been implemented, we will have accomplished a tremendous advantage for the future generations of our children, saving millions of kids and adults the pain and burden that had befallen so many victims in the past.

© Herbert Jay Rosenfield 2017

“Child Sexual Abuse Survivors Are Not Sleeping Well!”

                                                 Not Sleeping Well

During the Presidential campaign, many women and men who are adult survivors of child sexual abuse were particularly distressed by the contrast between the public declarations of respectfulness of women by then-candidate Donald Trump and the observations and accusations to the contrary.

• “Nobody has more respect for women than I do!”  03/30/2016 [www.nbcnews.com]
• “You know, I’m automatically attracted to beautiful — I just start kissing them. It’s like a magnet. Just kiss. I don’t even wait. And when you’re a star, they let you do it. You can do anything. … Grab ’em by the pussy. You can do anything.” 10/08/2016 [www.nytimes.com]
• “Fifteen women have come forward with allegations against Donald Trump, each accusing him of inappropriate conduct. Their charges range from an unwanted touch from behind to aggressive, sudden kissing to fingers groping up their skirt and into their underwear.” 10/14/2016 [www.pbs.org]                                                                                            • “The events never happened. Never. All of these liars will be sued after the election is over,” Trump said during a speech Saturday in Gettysburg, Pa. 10/13/2016 [www.npr.org]

Of adult women and men who had been sexually abused as children, over 90% were abused by a perpetrator who was significantly older, known to the victim, and held a position of authority and/or power over the vulnerable child. Most of those ‘trusted adults’ had a positive public image … and the secret behavior of being a pedophile. As I have written in my book-in-progress, There Is Hope! Practices and Interventions for Successful Treatment of Adult Survivors of Child Sexual Abuse ©:

“These have been the titles of some of the “trusted roles” …

  • “Father”     “Mother”   “Brother”    “Sister”          “Grandfather”            “Step-Father”
  • “Uncle”       “Cousin”    “Mom’s Live-in Boy Friend”  “Foster brother”  “Babysitter”
  •  “Neighbor” “Family Friend”  “Doctor”   “Teacher”      “Clergyman”     “Coach”
  •  “Scout Leader” “Counselor”   “Policeman”     “Fireman”     “Bus Driver”   …

… the titles of the “trusted roles” of the vast majority of perpetrators whose innocent victims we therapists have assisted in their healing in our counseling practices, agencies, and institutions.”

With the reality of what they had experienced in their childhood and the media political coverage of the campaign, election, and ‘The First 100 Days’, this potentially reminds each survivor daily of what happened to her or him by another ‘trusted male’. Most child sexual abuse survivors are not sleeping very well!

As advocates and mental health providers, we must be aware of this private-public connection and, particularly, of its impact on this Child Sexual Abuse Survivor population. They need us to be sensitive to their possibly feeling even more vulnerable, having sleep difficulties, and having increased flashbacks and nightmares. They need us to reach out to them and offer our appropriate support now.

For a Bridge over Troubled Waters, There Is Hope!

There Is Hope! for Adult Survivors of Child Sexual Abuse ©

As an experienced Connecticut Licensed Clinical Social Worker (LCSW#: 000187) and Certified School Social Worker (CSSW#: 32180), I have worked extensively with and achieved unusual healing for adult survivors of child sexual abuse.  Our clients have achieved their significant success because of their hard work, their motivation, courage, and persistence, and a positive response to my style and innovations.  To share those methods and to encourage reasons for hopefulness, I am writing There Is Hope! for Adult Survivors of Child Sexual Abuse, with a goal of its 2019 publication.  ThereIsHope-Book.Com is my Internet vehicle to inform the far-too-many victims of child sexual abuse and their support systems about the book and to have optimism that they can achieve healing, grow healthier, and be happier.     

In addition, we therapists, while empathizing with our clients, can learn and practice ways to reduce our own potential vicarious trauma from our provision of counseling for this worthwhile and significantly injured client population.  

Finally, it is important that we all work together toward the accomplish-able goal of significantly reducing the frequency of child sexual abuse for all future generations.

Herbert Jay Rosenfield, LCSW, CSSW                                           [Post Updated: 01/30/2019]